MELISSA JARBOE
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Melissa Jarboe

Founder & CEO Military Veteran Project | Activist | Author SACRIFICED | Mother | Lover of life |

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2/14/2017

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Your Unsocialized Hound Is Not A Service Dog

9/18/2015

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by Dr. Ian Kupkee

Ah, the fake service dog. Like out-of-sync traffic lights and above-ground power lines, they’re one of those things that make my normally mild British temperament fall by the wayside. 

Allow me to rephrase that - it’s not the dogs that make my blood boil, but rather their owners. Who are these people? You’ve probably seen them. For me, the most recent was a lady in the grocery store with a teacup poodle in a Coach purse. Before that, there was the guy in the health food store pushing a Yorkshire terrier in a stroller. A few years ago it was a rather surly gentleman on a bus in Philadelphia. His “service dog” kept trying to attack an elderly passenger’s footed cane. And remember my friend Sue from last week’s column? Yeah, her actual service dog was recently attacked in public by a Corgi wearing a homemade service dog vest.

For the past five or so years, there has been a marked increase in incidents of pet owners who attempt to pass off their unsocialized pets as emotional support animals. Add to that the growing number of handlers who attempt to pass off their emotional support animals as service dogs, and you have the makings of a perfect storm that makes life more difficult for a demographic that already faces considerable challenges: the disabled. If you think I’m exaggerating for effect, think again.

Airline complaints against ESA’s and their handlers have risen steeply, causing many to demand a crackdown. As a response to this very issue, a recent law was passed banning so called service dogs from riding in shopping carts.  Another new law makes misrepresenting a pet as a service dog a second-degree misdemeanor. 

In all of the events I have personally witnessed, the humans handling these canine culprits shamelessly bullied service providers who were unaware of their rights. They blindsided these hard-working individuals by brandishing letters, threatening lawsuits, and throwing the kinds of public temper tantrums that would put a toddler to shame.

If you are one of these people, I am calling you out. If you would like to leave nasty comments, send me indignant emails, or blow up my social media accounts, be my guest. The traction is awesome and brings lots of hits to my website. I probably won’t bother to respond to you because I don’t have time to be bothered with entitled jerks - and that, my dear imposter, is exactly what you are. If on the other hand, you’re one the many beleaguered employees that has had to deal with said jerks, then listen up.

An emotional support animal is NOT, repeat NOT a service animal. They are not the same thing. ESA’s are NOT working animals. They are pets. For a refresher course on the differences click here.

A service dog has the right to accompany a handler wherever the general public is allowed. ESA’s are pets. If pets are not allowed, then neither are ESA’s. Period! Exceptions are made in matters of housing and air travel, but that’s it.

Emotional support animals are not required to go through any special training - and oftentimes, to be perfectly honest, it shows. If a so-called service dog is barking, sniffing, exploring, socializing, growling, lunging, freaking out at the sight of an old lady’s cane,or doing anything other than focusing exclusively on its handler, it is probably not a service dog.

If the animal is not a service animal, it is not entitled to be there. You can ask them to leave, and you should. This is not just a matter of principle. It’s a matter of complying with the rules and laws that may govern your place of business. Do you really want to be saddled with health code violations and the fines that accompany them because a hyper-attached pet owner just had to bring Fluffy to brunch? No pets allowed means just that. Even legitimate emotional support animals are still pets. You have every right to ask their handlers to leave, even if they get nasty.

If you’re reading this article and wondering what kind of person would risk jail time and fines for the privilege of schlepping their pets around, you’re not alone. As long as they’re promised anonymity, fakers are very frank about their motivations. They often cite reasons such as not wanting to leave their pets home alone, not wanting to hire dog walkers, not wanting to crate-train, separation anxiety (presumably the pet’s!), convenience, not wanting to pay a fee to fly with their pet, or my personal favorite, “This country is so backwards. In Europe, you can bring a dog anywher.!” I’m European and guess what? When my wife and I go out to brunch, we leave our dogs at home. Here’s why:

It’s. The. Law.

Perhaps the all-time prize-winner was the pet blogger who bragged that her fake service dog was the best trained dog she knew. I will not publish her name or the link to the article because I refuse to reward her behavior with money and/or attention, but the long and the short of it was that she felt the privilege of taking her dog in public was her reward for having put so much time and effort into training said dog. The piece reeked of entitlement and sent my blood straight to the boiling point. Thankfully, the author’s self-righteous attitude was ripped to shreds in the comment section, so perhaps the world has not gone completely mad just yet.

I’ll close this article with a missive from a client whom I’ll call Bob. Bob is combat veteran who survived a tour of duty in Afghanistan, and a second in Iraq. He came home with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and his service dog has been vital in helping him along the long road to recovery. He explained his frustration with the fake service dog phenomenon as follows:

“When people get burned by a fake service dog team, they develop anti-bodies. Then I come along with my legit service dog, and there’s an issue. They get defensive, or they ask questions they’re not supposed to ask, they give me attitude, they tail me like I’m some kind of criminal. Dude, the ‘S’ in PTSD stands for ‘stress’. I don’t need that “expletive”. And on a bad day, I can’t handle it. I knew when I enlisted that my choice involved risk, so I’m not looking for anybody’s sympathy. I’m looking to get my life back. All I want is for people to respect a set of laws that allows people like me to keep going. I don’t think that’s so terribly much to ask.”

Neither do I.

But if you’re surfing Etsy to find a convincing-looking service dog vest for Snowflake, well, apparently you do. Way to go thanking our wounded warriors for their service. I told you I was going to call you out, and while I realize the animal section is generally a place for feel-good pieces, I hope I made you feel bad about yourself. If I did, don’t despair. The fix is an easy one. Instead of the faker-vest, buy Snowflake a nice fluffy bed and an interesting toy. She’ll have great fun with both when you go out for brunch and leave her - and your “letter”- at home.

For more information about service dogs, please visit the Americans With Disabilities Act’s website. 

 

Do you have a question for Dr. Kupkee? Send him an email by clicking here.

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Why did I start the #Lowertheflag movement?

7/21/2015

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I will not pretend to have answers for your questions about why flags at government/federal building were not placed at half mast. Nor, do I blame anyone for this not being completed in a timely fashion. What I will tell you and explain is that I know as an American I have the right to freedom of speech, the right to stand up for what I believe and start a national movement in a positive light. Now imagine this, for the last 24 hours thousands of people worldwide from different backgrounds, religions, races and beliefs united to help honor the fallen marines from Chattanooga. The main focus of these supporters to help lower the flags to honor the sacrifice of service members they may or may not of known, because in their hearts they knew it was the right thing to do. To me, I smiled each time someone joined the movement knowing that we were finally living the American dream in my mind "United we stand, Divided we fall." To me, that is what America is all about, Uniting as one, together to support, value and respect someone's freedom of speech, the right to their beliefs and the right to stand up for what they love. Way to go, World!

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It's not that I don't like you..

5/12/2015

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I have to acknowledge that I have a certain personality and can only accept so much. So, I'll just take small doses of people for a period of time and be thankful for the time I am given.

As a personality type A, I acknowledge I am the following;

Ambitious. High strung. Perfectionist.

Type A individuals are known for rather uptight behavior, but just like any other personality trait, there's more to us than what you see on the surface. To know a Type A person is to love them -- flaws and all. Below are just a few things Type A people want you to know about the personality.

We're not impatient, just efficient.Long lines? Traffic? Type A individuals loathe them all. This is because we feel as though they're slowing our progress of a certain goal, according to John Schaubroeck, a professor of psychology and management at Michigan State University -- even if that goal is just to deposit a check at the ban

2. Arriving late to anything is agonizing.If you tell us to be somewhere at 6:30, more likely than not, we're rolling up to the parking lot at 6:25. Type A folks tend to have an oversensitivity to time, because we don't want to feel like we're wasting it.

3. We live by to-do lists.How else are we supposed to track what we're supposed to get done?!

4. Each task we're assigned is urgent.Because of this, we value team members who work with the same brevity and speed that we do. Once again, wasting time is our ultimate enemy. Type A workers "appreciate individuals that can communicate in a clear, concise and succinct manner," psychologist and project management executive Bernado Tirado wrote in a Psychology Today blog post.

5. We're extremely goal-oriented.Once we commit to something, we see it through until the very end, whether it's a work project or Friday night plans. "[Type A's] are certainly more occupied with achieving outcomes," Schaubroeck previously told HuffPost Healthy Living. "And given that they're so occupied with achieving their goals, it makes sense that they would be more likely to do so."

6. It's hard for us to relax.This is where time sensitivity comes into play again. We hate the idea of letting time pass if there's something we need to be doing, so relaxing in the middle of our workday is a bit of a challenge (but necessary, as research shows). Downtime tends to feel unproductive to Type A folks -- unless, of course, it's on our to-do list.

7. We get stressed out easily.According to Friedman, certain personalities -- like Type A -- are more sensitive to stress (which, as we know, is terribly bad for our health). We also tend to default on the worst possible outcome when working through a situation. Sorry in advance for the slight negativity.

8. We have nervous habits.For me, it's hair twirling. For others, it's nail biting or teeth grinding. This behavior is common for Type A personalities, according to cardiologist and personality researcher Meyer Friedman.

9. We're emotional.The reason we behave the way that we do is because we care (some could even argue that we care just a little too much). Researchers suggest that Type A people are highly conscientious -- so while it may seem like we're uptight when we're organizing our friend's birthday party, it's really just because we want it to be spectacular. They deserve it.

10. We're constantly ruminating over something.You know when you just replay a mistake over and over in your head? This is a common occurrence for Type A individuals. We are notorious for dwelling on our worries, sometimes to the point where it keeps us up at night.

11. We have a competitive side.This is perhaps one of our most glaring flaws. Type A's put a lot of pressure on themselves to be the best possible version of themselves, which sometimes is taken to mean "the best person in the room." It doesn't matter if it's a work assignment or a board game, they're all the same to a Type A personality.

Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and Type A people are no exception. We mean well though, we promise.

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